Remember That We Are Home To Each Other
We were sitting in his office after a long strategic planning meeting. In particular, we were reviewing the initial draft of possible strategic choices when he paused, put down his notes, and said to me: “I went to a funeral last week.”
“Oh,” I replied. “I am sorry for your loss.”
He paused again, and continued: “One of our employees lost their sister in a tragic accident. I’ve known this employee for many years. We do not visit often, but enough that our relationship was more than just superficial. When I got back to my office after hearing of her loss, I just sat down in this chair and thought to myself, ‘What if I lost one of my siblings? How would I want my company to respond to this news?’. I just sat here quietly and realized that my siblings are very important in my life. We have history. We are family. Their presence means a lot to me.
So, I cleared my calendar and went to the funeral. I sat in the back by myself. I didn’t want this choice to be about the CEO showing up at the funeral. I just wanted my choice to reflect my values. I wanted her to know I cared. It mattered. This was important.
Other people came from her department. They sat together and grieved with her before and afterwards. They were her circle of immediate support along with her family and friends.
When it was my turn to greet her, and the family in the receiving line, I tried to shake her hand and say ‘I am sorry for your loss,’ but she just hugged me and said ‘thank-you for coming. This means a lot to me.’
On my drive home, I realized that this choice was the right choice. I didn’t do it, because I was the CEO. It also was not some sort of symbolic gesture on my part and that it would be good for the company. I just did it because it was the right thing to do.
No matter where we work and what our job title is, we need to stand with each other through the good times and the hard times. We need to be present. We need to show up.
It’s been a week now, and I am glad I went. It reminds me to focus on what is important, not just what is pressing.”
“Thank-you for sharing this with me,” I responded. “When we act from our own personal nexus and then choose a path to move forward, we discover a core that does not change. We also discover a legacy perspective that is greater than just situational awareness. We come to understand that we are all in this together, and in the end, we are all moving in the same direction.”
As Father Gregory Boyle reminds us: “We don’t just walk each other home to wholeness; we are home to each other.” When we find our wholeness on the path, we can help others to do likewise. And this makes a profound difference in the lives of all involved.
Serve The Force That Sent You Into The World
Rather than solely rely on the past to interpret the future, these people who are dedicated to the practice of leading well, relied on the nexus of their lives and the lessons learned on the praxis to find, experience and share the wisdom learned and wisdom experienced. They did not do it for a reward, but instead saw it as a responsibility. They grasped the importance of service, and the depth of meaning found by serving others. They understood that the quality of their inner life had direct, outer implications and consequences to the way they lived, and engaged with others.
Therefore, they routinely created time for quiet discernment and reflection. They choose to listen to others, and to learn from others. They realized that it is not what we see, but how we see it that transforms our lives, and our praxis.
As the Dalai Lama reminds us, “I am one of eight billion people.” But even though I am one of eight billion, when I find my praxis, I discover something special, the capacity to be both centered and grounded, moving and still, connected and transcendent.
From this place, I then grasp why I am here. “The meaning of life,” writes Leo Tolstoy, “is to serve the force that sent you into the world.” Thus, I serve. I role model. I make a difference. I do my best each and every day. And I remember that this life is a gift. This praxis also is an opportunity to serve, and for that I am humbly grateful to be here and now.
© Geery Howe 2026
