The Stones In Your Pocket

Growing up dyslexic was a challenging journey. School was a struggle from beginning to end. Reading was unbelievably difficult. I had to recognize the letters, then the words, and finally figure out what they meant. 

Furthermore, back in the day, we also wrote everything in cursive. Every day, the moving of that pencil across those lined pieces of paper was dificult. I had to go slowly and still I did not get them right. I always was struggling. Whether I was reading to myself, reading out loud to the class, or writing with paper and pencil, each lesson was a challenge and often a source of great discouragement.

The one person who heard all about this was my late mother. On the ride home from school, or over an afternoon snack at the kitchen table, I would pour out my frustrations to her about school and life. I did not know what to do or how to cope. School just kept happening. I was trying my best and many days it was clearly not making a difference.

One day, after a lot of listening to me she shared the following.

“Life is not easy, Geery. You can carry all of your problems around like they are stones in your pocket. And over time, they will just weigh you down.

Or you can learn to take these stones out of your pocket and lay them down. You need to learn to let go of them and let God help you with them.”

And with that, I had a new way of coping. I could just “let go and let God help me.” Over time, I shortened her comments to simply “let go; let God.” At times, I still struggle with my dyslexia but I do not carry it around like stones in my pocket. I have learned to lay it down and let God help. My late mother sure could put things back into perspective. And that is one of the powerful things that a good role model and mentor does for people.

This week, stop carrying your problems around like stones in your pocket. It is time to lay them down and put them into the hands of a higher power. From personal experience, I can assure you that it will make a difference.

Geery Howe, M.A. Consultant, Executive Coach, Trainer in Leadership, Strategic Planning and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257

Embrace Your Challenges

Last week, I shared that great leaders accept their path in the world of leadership, and keep moving forward. In essence, they own it. They recognize that “this is mine to do.” 

Upon further reflection, I think that great leaders not only own the path and keep moving forward but they also embrace their challenges. As Marcus Aurelius wrote so very long ago, “Our actions may be impeded . . . but there can be no impeding our intentions or dispositions. Because we can accommodate and adapt. The mind adapts and converts to its own purposes the obstacle to our acting. The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”

As leaders, we recognize that our work involves, people, structure, systems and culture. We explore mission, vision and values. We spend hours working on strategy, brand identity, and understanding the strategic landscape. 

And yet, the result of all this work is that we will continue to experience obstacles and challenges. They do not go away. They just keep coming. People, including ourselves if we are honest, feel frustrated, overwhelmed, anger and even confusion by this. But in the end, we, who sit in the leadership chair, have to make decisions and keep moving forward.

Here is where the great leaders do something unique. They understand what Andy Grove, former CEO of INTEL, meant when he wrote, “Bad companies are destroyed by crisis. Good companies survive them. Great companies are improved by them.”

Ryan Holiday in his wonderful book, The Obstacle Is The Way: The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph, Penguin, 2014, writes “It’s a huge step forward to realize that the worst thing to happen is never the event, but the event and losing your head.” Great leaders embrace the difficult challenges before them and do not loose their head. As Holiday continues, “See things for what they are. Do what we can. Endure and bear what we must.”

As the Haitian proverb states, “Behind mountains are more mountains.” There will be more problems in the future. This is normal in the world of leadership. However, our choice to persevere through them is what separates the great leaders from the good leaders.

This week, embrace the challenges you have. Work with others to solve them. Then, learn from them. But, in the end, always keep moving forward with commitment, clarity and integrity. This is the path to being a great leader.

Geery Howe, M.A. Consultant, Executive Coach, Trainer in Leadership, Strategic Planning and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257