Building Connections Instead of Connectivity

It was many years ago when they called me to stop by and see their state of the art computer lab. As I walked in, the room was filled with computers in rows and a huge screen up front. My host that morning explained to me that the company had invested in all these machines and a new software program so everyone in the room could explore a strategic level question at the same time. Then, once people started typing, they could also read all the other comments people were writing plus add their own comments. A massive level of sharing was going to take place and it would all be recorded on the big screen so people could see it happening live.

I smiled as she listed all the benefits of this new strategic level computer lab. Then I asked a simple question, “Why don’t people just talk directly to each other and skip the computer?

A long time ago, I remember my young son calling up his best friend on the phone and checking to see if he was home. Then, he said the following: “Great! Hang up and let’s instant message.” And they did.

While I like novel approaches, there is something very powerful that happens when people listen and share face to face. They make a deeper connection than just the words. Clarity is more than just a head and ear experience. When it is real, one feels it, not just thinks it.

As Margaret Wheatley wrote years ago, "It is time to become passionate about what is best in us, and to create organizations that welcome our creativity, contribution, and compassion. We do this by using processes that bring us together to talk to one another, listen to one another's stories, reflect together on what we're learning as we do our work. We do this by developing relationships of trust, where we do what we say, where we speak truthfully, where we refuse to act from petty self-interest."

My hope is that this week you will commit to developing relationships of trust where our connections are based on meaningful sharing and listening.

Geery Howe, M.A. Consultant, Executive Coach, Trainer in Leadership, Strategic Planning and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257

A Little Secret

I want to let you in on a little secret. The future is unknowable and the future is also uncontrollable. Furthermore, the future is filled with paradoxes, mysteries and confusion.

And at the exact same time, we live in an imperfect world. As leaders, our schedules for the day will get interrupted. Our work will get side lined with “Oh, by the way...” comments. Our well organized projects will get reorganized by factors over which we have no control. And we will get frustrated and angry by the craziness around us.

In truth, the future and the present are always scary on one level. So given this little secret, what do we do?

We try and protect ourselves from this imperfection. We prepare for it. We fear it. We search for predictability, explanations and answers. We search for order so we can have a sense of peace and a sense of control. 

We want to feel order. We want to feel valued. We want to feel certain. We do not want to feel alone with the unknowable and uncontrollable future. In short, we want perfection.

Surprisingly, people who find and maintain balance in their work and in their personal life have discovered something other than perfection. It is through shared connections and shared knowing that they can handle the now and the future. That’s what we have been doing all these years at the Spring and Fall From Vision to Action Executive Roundtables, and in the From Vision to Action Leadership Training. We have been building shared connections and shared knowing. 

It is pretty amazing that with shared connections and shared knowing, we can find balance in an unbalanced world.

Geery Howe, M.A. Consultant, Executive Coach, Trainer in Leadership, Strategic Planning and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257