A number of years ago, Marcus Buckingham and Ashley Goodall in their book, Nine Lies About Work: A Freethinking Leader’s Guide to the Real World (Harvard Business Review Press, 2019), wrote: “Checking in with each person on a team - listening, course-correcting, adjusting, coaching, pinpointing, advising, paying attention to the intersection of the person and the real-world work - is not what you do in addition to the work of leading. This is the work of leading.”
In our rush to get things done, I think we forget that checking in with each person on the team is the work of leadership. I think we forget to be of assistance to them rather than thinking they need to be offering assistance to us. I think the work of leading can happen each and every day if we remember to focus on the intersection of the person and the work.
As we embrace this simple, but powerful choice, we need to do three more things very well. First, we must remember to manage up and across the organizational chart, not just down. Collaboration is the foundation for success during turbulent times. As part of this broader process, we need to understand the difference between ripe, unripe and ripening issues across the organization. Just because we think something is a hot button issue does not mean everyone else does. Therefore, we need to look at issues from multiple positions and multiple perspectives. We also need to recognize the difference between discernment and judgement when making a decision. When we engage in more discernment before engaging in problem solving, we can be better at helping others.
Second, we need to learn to lead without ignoring the people we love. There will always be more work than time to complete everything. Home and major relationships outside of work should not always be a distant second to getting the work done. If this happens, then we have let the non-essential piles undermine what is most essential in our life. Remember that the word integrity comes from Latin meaning “to make whole.” When we make choices that fragment us and our life, we undermine all that helps us cope and maintain perspective at the interaction of life and work.
Third, we need to remember our presence makes a statement. While actions speak louder than words, words still matter. They impact people and they can make a profound difference on how people engage with their job and others. If we choose to back up our words with thoughtful and consistent action, we are helping others make better choices. It is the combination of thoughtful action and thoughtful speaking that makes a statement about what we value and who we value. Being present and choosing to listen is critical to leading people.
When we do the aforementioned three things well, we bring a level of authenticity and integrity to the daily work of listening, coaching and advising. We also build trust and create a greater level of commitment to accomplishing short term projects and long term goals. The intersection of life and work is busy and dynamic. People are working hard and want to get things done in a timely, accurate and efficient manner. When we meet them where they are, we can help them make progress and know that their job matters. And that is what people want to be experiencing at the intersection of life and work.
© Geery Howe 2025
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