Decision-Making And Discernment

There has been many books and articles written about decision-making. One exceptionally good article is the following: “Making Judgment Calls: The Ultimate Act of Leadership” by Noel M. Tichy and Warren Bennis in the October 2007 issue of the Harvard Business Review. It is well worth the time and effort to reread it as you work on preparing for next year. 

To build on the decision-making framework within the article, and as individuals and companies finalize the goals that will need to be accomplished during 2024, I think there is an important exercise we need to explore in order to help us when it comes to the execution of these new goals. 

First, think forward into 2024 and start with the premise that all the decisions have been made, all the actions have been taken, and that you have already reached your goal or goals.  Then, with this mind, ask yourself the following two questions:

- What will be the impact and/or outcome of reaching this goal or these goals by the fourth quarter of 2024?

- In what new ways, would we have acted in order to reach this goal or these goals by the fourth quarter of 2024?

Second, recognize that discernment about outcomes and the pathways we choose to reach those outcomes are critical to successful leadership. Decisions about goals, and discernment about choices post the decisions are critical to short and long term success. 

Now is the time to give ourselves permission to think forward and to think realistically about the future and about how to achieve the outcomes we seek. 

Then, we can make 2024 one of our best years yet. 

This week, answer the above two questions for yourself, and then explore them with your team. 

Geery Howe, M.A. Executive Coach in Leadership, Strategic Planning, and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257

The Need For Courage In The Face Of Uncertainty

Introduction

Given the degree of market uncertainty, political polarization, and labor pool instability, leaders at all levels are struggling. They are uncertain about how to move forward strategically, and how fast to move forward operationally. Given the last three years, they do not want to place themselves or their organization at risk. They know there are many unforeseen variables at play. As a result, they can not easily see the big picture. Therefore, they hesitant on how to proceed. When discussing this current situation with me, many have asked, “What should I do? I am not sure what is the next step.”

After much listening and subsequent reflection, my response has been the following: “It is time for you to find the place of courage inside you, and then to act from this place. This sounds simple, but it will not be easy. Courage is a complex choice, and requires complex actions.”

What Is Courage?

For people of a certain age, the word courage has a direct connection to a book called Profiles In Courage by John F. Kennedy. Published in 1956, this volume of short biographies describes the acts of bravery and integrity by eight United States senators who defied the opinions of their party and their constituents to do what they felt was right. As a result, they suffered severe criticism and losses in popularity. 

For others, the subject of courage leads them to the work of Brene Brown, the professor, who is known for her work on shame, vulnerability and leadership, and author of such books as Daring Greatly, Rising Strong, and Atlas Of The Heart. As she writes, “Courage is a heart word. The root of the word courage is ‘cor’ - the Latin word for heart. In one of its earliest forms, the word courage meant ‘To speak one’s mind by telling all one’s heart’.” What ever the source of our understanding about the word courage, I think we need to dive more deeply into the meaning of it. 

The dictionary defines courage as “the ability to do something that frightens you” and “strength in the face of pain or grief.” Other sources define the word as “the choice and willingness to confront agony, pain, danger, uncertainty or intimidation,” and “the mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear or difficulty.” 

On one level, I like these definitions because they focus on the ability to do something difficult even when there is risk. But a deeper exploration into this word reveals that courage is a quality of mind and spirit that enables someone to act in spite of fear, risk and uncertainty. Courage reflects the moral and mental strength to do what is right, with confidence, determination, and resolution. Upon reflection, it is clear to me that courage come from within. It is a choice to live and act with compassion, and integrity.

Actions Of The Heart

Referencing back to Brene’ Brown’s definition of courage, all of these choices are actions of the heart. The question then is the following: “What are the actions of the heart we need to take at this time period?” The answer is a challenging one. 

First, we need to choose a different paradigm of leadership. The traditional leadership paradigm given current events is to default to a command and control form of leadership. It is the way many leaders over time have chosen to cope with the inevitable and constant, messy elements of organizational change within an unstable market. These leaders choose to lead based on their job title and positional authority. Often, they lead from behind through fear, intimidation, and dominance. Their actions generate a forced movement forward, but over time it mostly maintains status quo, and lowers any level of disequilibrium or chaos in order to increase predictability, i.e. stability over change. 

However, courageous leaders, who choose to lead from the heart, understand that they must not lead from above or behind, but instead to lead from within. They do this by walking with others through the world of organizational change. These leaders choose a paradigm of collaboration, connection, and co-creation which results in all involved owning and understanding what needs to get done and how it needs to get done. They recognize that courageous leaders do not create followers or subordinates, but instead create partners and colleagues. And within this level of relationship, there is the generation of commitment based on clarity rather than fear. 

Second, we need to choose to be vulnerable when dealing with risk and uncertainty. At first glance, this seems like a wildly, non-logical choice. However, when we understand this choice from a larger perspective, we can grasp that it is a very smart choice. 

Brene’ Brown in her book, Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience (Random House, 2021), writes “Vulnerability is the emotion that we experience during times of uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure…. Vulnerability is not weakness; it’s our greatest measure of courage.” Recognizing that vulnerability is a feeling and a choice, she continues, “Choosing to be curious is choosing to be vulnerable because it requires us to surrender to uncertainty. We have to ask questions, admit not knowing, risk being told that we shouldn’t be asking, and sometimes, make discoveries that lead to discomfort.” 

When we choose to be vulnerable, we are choosing to ask more questions and to listen to more people and more diverse ideas. In essence, we are expanding our perspective in order to be courageous, i.e. walk with others and to partner with others so we can co-create effective solutions. 

Brene’ Brown in her book, Dare To Lead: Brave Work, Tough Conversations, Whole Hearts (Random House, 2018), notes that “You can’t get to courage without rumbling with vulnerability.” As she explains, “A rumble is a discussion, conversation, or meeting defined by a commitment to lean into vulnerability, to stay curious and generous, to stick with the messy middle of problem identification and solving, to take a break and circle back when necessary, to be fearless in owning our parts, and as psychologist Harriet Lerner teaches, to listen with the same passion with which we want to be heard…. Our ability to be daring leaders will never be greater than our capacity for vulnerability.” And for me, this is why choosing to be vulnerable is an action of the heart and it is a wise choice in the face of uncertainty and risk.

Third, we need to expand our networks with new relationships in order to gain more new insights. Herminia Ibarra in her book, Act Like A Leader, Think Like A Leader (Harvard Business Review Press, 2015) note that effective leaders have three networks, namely an operational one, a personal one, and a strategic one. As she writes, “The first helps you manage current internal responsibilities, the second boosts personal development, and the third focuses on new business directions and the stakeholders you must get on board to pursue these directions.” In particular, the third network, the strategic one, “is made up of relationships that help you to envision the future, sell your ideas, and get the information and resources you need to exploit these ideas…. A good strategic network gives you connective advantage: the ability to marshal information, support, or other resources from one of your networks to obtain results in another.” I have seen leaders who have all three networks in place and, as a result, do amazing things during difficult times. 

But, upon reflection, I have realized that courageous leaders have a fourth network, namely a wisdom network made up of mentors and advisors who help on a completely different level. John O’Donohue, the late Irish poet, author and priest, calls these people “friends.” As he explains, “In these times of greed and externality, there is such unusual beauty in having friends who practice profound faithfulness to us, praying for us each day without our ever knowing or remembering it. There are often lonesome frontiers we could never endure or cross without the inner sheltering of these friends. It is hard to live a true life that endeavors to be faithful to its own calling and not become haunted by the ghosts of negativity; therefore, it is not a luxury to have such friends; it is necessary.” For me, this wisdom network is made up of “friends” and wise mentors who practice being present when we are stretched, and when asked, are willing to offer guidance, counsel, and insights, all actions that come from the heart. 

The convergences of these three actions of the heart, namely to choose a leadership paradigm based on collaboration, connection, and co-creation, to  choose vulnerability over control, and to expand our networks with new relationships in order to gain new insights, yields the capacity to be courageous, i.e. to have the moral and mental strength to do what is right, with confidence, determination, and resolution in spite of the fear, the risks, and the endless unforeseen variables and uncertainties that come with being a leader. 

The Inner Revolution Precedes The Outer One

“We can’t opt out of the uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure that’s woven throughout our daily experiences. Life is vulnerable,” writes Brene’ Brown in her book, Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead (Avery, 2012). Being a leader means we have to deal with this uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure on a daily basis. However, just because these elements are normal does not mean that they are easy to deal with, or that we are comfortable in dealing with these elements. Life may be vulnerable and it may be challenging. But as leaders we still have to make important choices for us as individuals, and for us collectively, i.e. for the company as a whole. 

With this in mind, I believe we need to remember the following text from the I Ching, an ancient Chinese book that has served for thousands of years as a study of change in human life, a guide to an ethical life, and a manual for rulers. As the author wrote, “No revolution in outer things is possible without prior revolution in one’s inner way of being. Whatever change you aspire to . . . must be preceded by a change in heart.” 

When we grasp the magnitude of this ancient insight, we realize that the inner work of courage will always precedes the outer work of courage. We also understand the importance of doing our inner work on a regular basis and in a disciplined manner. For when this happens, we create the moral and mental strength to do what is right, with confidence, determination, and resolution. We also choose to live and act with compassion and integrity. And given currents events in the world, this is a powerful and transformative action in the face of fear, risk, and uncertainty. 

© Geery Howe 2023

Geery Howe, M.A. Executive Coach in Leadership, Strategic Planning, and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257

Facing The Unknown

Introduction

Crossing the threshold to retirement has been more than a transition. It has been a rite of passage into a new and, for me, uncharted territory. I have moved  away from the “grace of presence and belonging” to a work community, a phrase from the late Irish poet John O’Donohue, into a new world. 

For many people in the work world, the retirement rite of passage is focused on saying good-bye to the one who is leaving the workforce. And this is an important and meaningful experience for all involved. But, on the other side of this experience, there is not a rite of passage for welcoming someone into the world of retirement. Instead, we stumble into retirement, wondering what is next, and we are perplexed by all the new possibilities.  

From my experience during this past year, I still can not comprehend the full weight of retirement. It has taken me nearly a year to grasp the impact of it, and I think it will take me five more years to fully comprehend it. Still, I have learned a few things along the way that I can share with you.  

An Ending & A New Beginning

Shortly after I retired from all work related travel and teaching, I was in the office working on a piece writing. The phone rang and I answered it. It was a client from many years ago and he wanted to know when the next Executive Roundtable was going to take place, because he wanted to bring his whole team. 

I paused and said, “Oh my. I have retired. There are not going to be any more Roundtables.”

“Wow,” he responded. “A great man has died today.”

I did not respond as I was quickly reviewing the day’s news in my head. I had no idea who he were referring to that moment. Finally, I said, “Who?”

“You,” he replied. 

I was stunned. 

“I did not die. I retired,” I explained. “I just stopped 35+ years of traveling and going to numerous meetings per week and teaching numerous seminars and workshops per month. I am still reading, learning, living, and exploring. I am just not doing it within a traditional work environment.”

As I reflected on this conversation, I came to realize that many people have framed up the idea of retirement as an ending. And, on one level, it is an ending. But, for me and many others I have visited with who are further down the pathway than I am, it also is a transition into something new, an evolution, and for some, a complete transformation of self-definition. It is an opportunity to no longer be defined by a job description and a job title. Instead, it provides a person the time and space to explore, think, reflect, and over time create a whole new way of living and moving through the world. 

Explore A Variety of New Schedules

One of the first things that happened when I retired is that I did not know how to start me day. After many decades of doing certain things in a specific order so I could be focused on the right and important things that needed to get done that day, I found myself adrift in options, potential, and a smattering of various possibilities. Over time, I did figure it out how to start my morning off, which I will share shortly. However, not knowing how to start my day was a symptom of a larger problem, namely I did not know how to define a day. 

On one level, this seems a simple problem.  Just go out and start the day. But, in reality, most of my Monday through Friday schedules had been defined by work. For example, I needed to be in the office by a specific time in order to be available for clients. My day ended when most other working people ended their work day. In between, there were meetings, trainings, and consultations. Some years, I had certain events scheduled eighteen months in advance. 

And then, retirement showed up. My calendar was mostly empty. I did not need to be in the office by a specific time, or at all. I did not need to end my day around a specific time. It was liberating and deeply frustrating because my day was no longer defined by “normal working hours.” Instead, I could organize it any which way I wanted. And the difficulty was that I did not know what I wanted because I had no memory of this kind of life, a life not defined by a clock, projects, and deadlines. 

So, the first step was to try a whole lot of schedules and see what worked, referencing the writing of Collins and Porras in their book, Built To Last. The difficulty was that this took time, energy, and a lot of experimentation. 

While I wanted a fast solution, I quickly realized that this was not going to take place. Experimentation is experimentation. So, day after day, I tried one way of moving through the day and then another. It was a long journey. 

After eight months, I have finally found a comfortable daily schedule. I created a morning start to the day pattern which helped me tremendously. Next, I created two “work zones,” for lack of a better term. The morning one is about two and a half hours long, and the afternoon one is roughly two hours long. Then, I developed an end of the day pattern before moving into the whole dinner routine. This is one of my favorite parts of the afternoon because it involves walking the dog and, depending on the time of the year, greeting the neighborhood children as they come home from school. 

The key to all of this is that I had to give myself permission to experiment and slowly figure it over time. For now, it is a work-in-progress. Still, an 85 year old mentor and friend of mine has encouraged me to start taking a nap after lunch. He says it makes a big difference during the second half of the day. I just smile and remind him that I am just starting the retirement pathway. When I am in my 80’s, I am sure I will add this to my daily schedule. 

Be Still And Reflect Deeply

As I mentioned earlier, I found that my daily schedule had been tossed up in the air and returned to earth in a tumbled pile when I retired. As a result, many of the things I normally did during each part of the day were either not needed or no longer applicable. I felt lost. 

One day, I told my wife, Jane, “I just don’t know how to start my day anymore.” She responded, “You will figure it out. Give it time and be patient.” And so, I slowly moved forward, testing and exploring different ways to start my day. 

In the beginning, I tried to slow down my morning routine and drink more coffee.  The outcome was being wired on caffeine and not sure what to do. Then, one morning, I decided to do something that seemed to work so well for my wife, Jane. It was one of her morning practices, namely sitting down and doing her “daily readings.”

Now, every morning, I sit in the same chair for 20 - 30 minutes with a pile of books, and a good cup of coffee. Some mornings, I read a chapter in one book or a couple of pages in another book, all for the purpose of gaining new insights, on-going learning, and deep study into a variety of topics. 

This collection of books has evolved over time, but they all have one thing in common. They are written by authors who I deeply respect given their life journeys or expertise. They are inspirational in nature, and many are faith based. They are all sources of wisdom and perspective. 

The outcome of my morning readings and the subsequent reflection that comes from this quality writing is that I find myself less stressed and overwhelmed by life’s on-going challenges. It slows down my feeling that life is unfolding faster than I can handle it. It reduces the cognitive and emotional intensity of my reactions to difficult issues and challenges. But on a deeper level, my morning readings fill me up with hope and a renewed inner clarity about how to move forward into this period of life called retirement. For this, I am eternally grateful to my wife for role modeling this practice and for the many authors who have written such excellent resources for a whole and faithful life. 

Continue To Seek Guidance & Perspective

I spent the majority of my career defining problems and solving problems. Some were technical and others were adaptive. Some were complicated and others were complex. Most had a time element to them and involved a group process. I liked this work and the resulting outcomes. It felt like I was making a difference in the world. And then, retirement happened. 

In the beginning, I turned all this problem solving energy into weekly projects. I mowed the grass on time, and took out the trash and recycling on time. I did the laundry on time and my part of the house cleaning on time. Then, I realized I had a problem, and it was me. 

When I was working five days a week, I had a schedule and many things to look forward to each week and each weekend. When I retired and after the initial rush of freedom, I realized that I did not have many things that I was looking forward to doing. For example, taking the trash and the recycling to the curb early, the first one on the block, could not be one of the highlights of my week. In short, while I like daily and weekly routines, I definitely needed to have things that I looked forward to each week. 

The solution was pretty simple once I figured it out. I needed to get back out in the world and visit with people. I needed to stay connected with my kitchen table cabinet, my circle of “advisors” and friends who have helped me all along. In particular, I needed to continue to seek out their guidance and perspective on a wide variety of subjects, including retirement. I needed to share, listen, and explore ideas, problems, and life’s ongoing challenges. In short, I needed to schedule time each week where I would look forward to being with someone and visiting with them, usually over a good cup of coffee, and on a special occasion a nice muffin or pastry. 

Keep Learning

Upon reflection, retirement has taught me about the immense nearness of today’s choices and the mysterious distance of the future possibilities. There will always be new options and opportunities to experiment, to seek out the wisdom and counsel of others, and to reflect deeply.  The key is to remind myself that I was a work-in-progress before I retired, and that I will continue to be a work-in-progress during my retirement. 

As Father Richard Rohr remind us,“The visible world is an active doorway to the invisible world, and the invisible world is much larger than the visible.” As a retired person, I have more time and space now to explore the visible and the invisible, all with the goal of becoming my best and true self. Thus for me, retirement is the next step on a pathway I have been traveling my whole life. It is a new beginning and a line of continuity all at the same time. And each day, I am grateful for the opportunity to keep moving forward. 

© Geery Howe 2023

Geery Howe, M.A. Executive Coach in Leadership, Strategic Planning, and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257

A Walk In Nature

In 1984, renowned scientist, E.O. Wilson created the biophilia hypothesis which suggested that humans possess an innate tendency to seek connections with nature and other forms of life. This desire to want to connect with nature has been part of us since the beginning of time, and nature looms large in the cultural traditions and religions of the world. 

From my experience, the beauty of nature can fill us with awe, renewal, and perspective. When we witness the fall migration of the monarch butterflies, the gold finches eating the dried seed heads of the purple cone flowers, or the turning of the green leaves to gold and red, we come to realize that being in nature is essential to our well-being. It feels us up in a way that is unique and powerful. 

“I’ve long believed that the essence of our primal relationship with nature is poetry - the joy, the wonder, the intangible benefits, the awesome diversity of all life forms with whom we share this planet,” writes Carter Roberts, President & CEO of the World Wildlife Fund- US. For me, just being in nature is an extended experience of poetic and beneficial. 

As we work on our 2024 plans and goals, we need to stop occasionally and go take a walk in nature. As we do this, we will realize that planning can be an exercise where we intellectualize everything and anything. It can be all head and no heart. 

However, great breakthroughs can happen when we take extended times in the silence of nature. For it is here that we learn that we are not in control of everything and the verbal and written word can not capture the totality of change on all levels. Sometimes we have to remember that the miracles of life abound and that the natural world is greater than our plans. Nature is part of a much larger and longer cycle of life. 

This week, take time to walk in nature and remember the joy, the wonder, and the awesome diversity of all life forms with whom we share this planet. Then, create a plan for 2024 which gives life to all involved and generates tangible and intangible benefits. And along the way, rediscover the miracles that happening all around you in the nature world. 

Geery Howe, M.A. Executive Coach in Leadership, Strategic Planning, and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257

Psychological Resilience: An Important Skill For All Leaders - part #2

Three Choices That Build Psychological Resilience

Recognizing that psychological resilience is the capacity to respond quickly and constructively to uncertainty and complex change, there are three choices leaders can make on a daily basis to become better at being psychologically resilient. 

First, they must choose to respond rather than react to change. On the surface, this seems pretty simplistic, but in reality it is hard to do in the world of leadership because we are constantly bombarded with questions and problems that have no easy answers. Furthermore, many of these questions and problems arrive before us with incomplete information, biased opinions, and numerous uncontrollable variables. In short, we are handed a mess and expected to deliver an elegant solution. 

At the exact same time, many leaders are caught in a continuous partial attention syndrome. This phrase, coined by Linda Stone, a tech writer and consultant in 1998, is the choice to continuously divide our attention between several sources of information while scanning within each of them for what is relevant and applicable. The outcome of this choice is that a leader is in constant interaction with everything and everyone around them, but not with much focus or depth in the level of interaction. As a result, when leaders are paying partial attention to many things and many people at the exact same time, those around the leader feel like the leader does not care about them as a person, and/or does not respect the challenges they are bringing to leadership. 

Moreover, leaders, because of this choice, tend to react rather than respond thoughtfully to people and the questions and problems people are bringing to them. Their constant partial scanning does not give them adequate head space, for lack of a better term, to think through a thoughtful response, especially when it comes to setting precedent or impact. In addition, many people feel, and then believe that the leader is not giving them or their problem the proper attention and respect that it and they deserve. Until leaders learn how to give others their full and undivided attention, they will usually default to control and command rather than collaboration and connection. In summary, the key is to make a conscious choice to focus and respond rather than just to focus and react.

Second, leaders must avoid getting caught in the cul-de-sacs of their mind. A cul-de-sac, as defined in urban planning, is a dead end street with no through road. It only has one way in and that is the same way out. Furthermore when you are in a cul-de-sac, you can only move in a circle or an endless loop with no forward progress. 

When a leader gets caught in the cul-de-sacs of their mind, they are engaged in an endless, reactive cycle of thinking and working. They are not engaging with any new information or fresh insights or perspectives. Instead, they are just looping over and over through the same information. When this happens, leaders need to ask themselves two important questions: Is this a useful course of inquiry? Will this result in a useful course of action? Nine times out of ten, they will realize they are stuck and not being productive. 

When I encounter this cul-de-sac level of thinking, I am reminded of something Richard Rohr wrote years ago: “It is ironic that you must go to the edge to find the center.” The challenge most leaders have forgotten is that within a cul-de-sac, there is no edge and the center is small and not very “centered.” Father Thomas Keating understood this perspective when he wrote: “Discernment is a process of letting go of what we are not.” And the reality of it all is that we do not have to be limited in our thinking and we do not have to get trapped in the cul-de-sacs of our mind. 

For a new level of clarity to emerge, we need allies and confidents. These key people help us to gain perspective and to put issues into perspective. Allies stand with us and support us. Confidents, who can come in the form of elders, mentors, executive coaches, and wise friends, ask us questions that make us think more creatively and holistically. It is the combination of the two that helps us to get out of these cul-de-sacs, and to stay out of them. And that helps us be more resilient. 

Third, leaders need to create an organizational culture of welcome and belonging. Given events of the last three years, I believe we need and want to feel like we belong, and like our voice and our efforts matter. We also need and want to feel supported and to feel like we are part of a community, a team, and a family. If we seek to build resilient people, teams, companies, and communities, then we must build a culture of welcome and belong. The two are interconnected. 

Everything Changes Over Time

To develop psychological resilience and a way of working that is generous and equal to the complexity of these times, we must choose to respond rather than react, avoid the cul-de-sacs of our minds, and create a culture of welcome and belonging. And as we do these three important steps, we will come to understand that, over time, people do not just respond or react to the environment in which they live and work, they adapt to it.

We forget as leaders that all involved are active participants in the events and the environment around us. And through our choices and actions, we are creating a better environment and better outcomes for ourselves and others. As Fred Provenza, retired Utah State University professor in the College of Natural Resources, notes: “Individuals are involved in the world, which allows them to evolve in the world.” It is this evolution that gives each of us the capacity to become psychologically resilient. 

Still, we must recognize that psychological resilience is an on-going evolution. It is aspirational, not just a fixed operational state of working and living. We become resilient rather than just do resilience. It is an on-going and evolutionary internal process more than just an external action of getting something done and checked off a list. When we grasp the magnitude of this work, we understand what the Irish poet, John O’Donohue, was saying when he wrote, “Every human person is inevitably involved in two worlds: the world they carry within them and the world that is out there.” When both of these worlds are united and moving in the same direction, we create a life where all are welcomed and all belong. And this is a transformative action on so many levels. 

© Geery Howe 2023

Geery Howe, M.A. Executive Coach in Leadership, Strategic Planning, and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257