One-Point Feedback

The subject of feedback in the world of leadership has become a hot topic again. People are struggling on how to give it, and how to receive it. With all of the performance management issues that have surfaced since last summer and appear to be continuing in 2015, I thought today I would share with you some writing I did on this subject back in the late 1980’s in the book, Listen To The Heart. Here goes:

When working out specific situations with others, there come moments when we have to give feedback. The key is to be issue-specific at all times. When giving feedback, it is important to describe other people’s behavior or feelings without evaluating or interpreting them. It also is helpful to share ideas and information rather than advice. If this pathway is followed, the receiver of the feedback is free to decide in light of his or her own goals in this particular situation how to integrate this new information.

Often individuals in conflict bring up all sorts of issues unconnected to the actual situation before them. This style of feedback is called “dumping” or “gunny-sacking.” In simple terms, there is an unloading of everything upon another individual. While the unloading process may feel wonderful, the information that the recipient can use is limited. The most helpful feedback focuses on the amount the recipient can use, not the amount the giver can offer.

Next, it is important to state the feedback in a direct manner by using first-person-singular pronouns - “I” or “my.”  By owning our statements and eliminating the royal “we” or elusive “one,” we make it clear that the feedback is ours. We are being honest with others, and direct.

Also, we need to recognize that the reception of feedback takes time to process. To help with the assimilation of new information, I have learned a very helpful technique. In my wife’s family, important statements are often prefaced with the words “I have a message for you.” When I first heard this statement, I did not understand the level of importance of the message that was to follow; in my childhood family, those words implied that someone had telephoned and you were about to get a synopsis of what he or she had said so you could call back. I got myself into some pretty hot situations with my wife until I learned the importance of those words.

Now, my wife and I use this phrase as a sign that feedback is about to begin. In simple terms it is a “flag phrase” that means “something important is about to be said; sit down and apply all your focus to the message.” By teaching those you live and work with that the phrase “I have a message” is a signal for feedback, you are helping them and yourself to improve the reception and integration of significant information.

From Listen to the Heart The Transformational Pathway to Health and Wellness by Geery Howe published back in 1991. For more information about the book, please click on the following link:  http://www.chartyourpath.com/Listen-to-the-Heart.html

Geery Howe, M.A. Consultant, Executive Coach, Trainer in Leadership, Strategic Planning and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257

Early Bird Special Reminder!

Before more of our winter thaw takes place here in the midwest, I just wanted to send you a friendly reminder that the “Early Bird Special” for the Spring 2015 From Vision to Action Executive Roundtable is set to expire on Friday, January 30.

If you sign up between now and 1/30/15, the price will be $ 275.00 for the two days and $ 175.00 for a single day. Here is the link to the registration form:

http://www.chartyourpath.com/pdf/2015-From-Vision-To-Action-Exec-Roundtable-Regist.pdf

Please write “early bird special” on it when you send it to me by mail or fax (# 319 - 643 - 2185).

After 1/30/15, the registration price will be $ 295.00 for the two days and $ 195.00 for a single day.

Here is the agenda for your review:

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

8:30 am - Registration

9:00 am - 10:15 am - How do leaders deal with continuous strategic and operational changes at the same time?

10:15 am - 10:30 am - Break

10:30 am - 12:00 pm - How do leaders create a mission driven, core-value led culture?

12:00 pm - 1:30 pm - Lunch and Networking 

1:30 pm - 2:45 pm - How do leaders distinguish between when to build teams and when to build single-leader work groups?

2:45 pm - 3:00 pm - Break

3:00 pm - 4:30 pm - How do leaders hold people accountable?

4:30 pm - Adjourn

Thursday, April 9, 2015

9:00 am - 10:15 am - How does one lead with executive presence?

10:15 am - 10:30 am - Break 

10:30 am - 12:00 pm - Integration and Application

12:00 pm - Adjourn

Location: Courtyard in West Des Moines - Clive, Iowa. Here is a link to this location: http://www.marriott.com/hotels/travel/dsmch-courtyard-des-moines-west-clive/

Hope you can come! Geery Howe, M.A. Consultant, Executive Coach, Trainer in Leadership, Strategic Planning and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257

Digging Holes with a Red Van - Part #2

Now, let’s pick up from where we left off on Monday, January 12, 2015:

Then we faced the question of the boulder at the bottom of the icehouse. We both crawled down into the hole, hugged the rock, and said, “This is where you came to rest and this is where you will stay until the next fools shall attempt to move you.” We each threw a handful of sawdust upon it, crawled out of the hole, and loaded our gear into the van. The, with a great noise from our punctured muffler, we roared down the mountain, and a couple of hours later we were back at the farmhouse. Noises tend to echo off the sides of the valleys in the mountains, and the entire homesteading crew was sitting out in the farmhouse porch listening to our arrival. They welcomed us home like heroes when we told them we had been attacked in the woods by a “wild stump creature” and barely escaped with our lives. Then, of course, we had to tell the truth and live with the weeks of teasing that followed.

So many times when I listen to people who are working through conflicts I think of this event in my life. It seems we are stuck in wanting to “get it all over at once.” We want the metaphorical rock out and we want it now. So we tend to choose the first solution that comes to mind and often nearly run ourselves into the pond before we really understand all the consequences of our actions. As a dear colleague of mine recently said, “When dealing with big issues, go slow and think small.” My digging partner and I needed to hear this advice when we left to accomplish a grand task all in one day. Conflict resolution and quality interpersonal communication does not happen instantaneously. It is an in-depth process involving your complete attention and awareness. One needs to learn to look backwards and forwards at the same time and also remember not to press too hard on the accelerator. I believe we are addicted to instant gratification and resolution. While this may be nice, it is probably the ideal rather than reality. The key is to work slowly and give the process time.

As I look back on my experience of digging out the icehouse, I wonder why, when we discovered the size of the rock at the bottom of the icehouse, we simply did not stop and take stock of our options. It was not until we had gotten ourselves in a big mess that we actually had lunch and talked about options. Similarly, small conflicts evolve so quickly into large ones that it is important to take time in the beginning to work them through or at least understand the parameters of the problem.

To this day, I suspect that the boulder is at the bottom of the icehouse “way up in the woods.” I have learned not to rush through projects and conflict resolution as fast as I used to. Now, I am growing more and more comfortable with changing what I can change and learning to with the boulders in my life. When I release my expectations and learn to live in the moment, then the health and wellness pathway before me is full of many wonderful lessons, even when I find that I am once again digging the metaphoric equivalent of holes with a red van.

From Listen to the Heart The Transformational Pathway to Health and Wellness by Geery Howe published back in 1991. For more information about the book, please click on the following link:  http://www.chartyourpath.com/Listen-to-the-Heart.html

Geery Howe, M.A. Consultant, Executive Coach, Trainer in Leadership, Strategic Planning and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257

Raising the Collective Intelligence

Noel Tichy in his book, The Cycle of Leadership: How Great Leaders Teach Their Companies to Win, HarperBusiness, 2002, writes that “winning organizations are teaching organizations” where “everybody teaches... everybody learns.” In such highly interactive environments, knowledge and understanding is generated and it makes everyone smarter.

As he notes, “Successful leaders are given stewardship over assets in the form of people, capital, information, and technology. Their job is to make them more valuable and to keep making them more valuable into the future.... In this environment, the key to winning is a leader's ability to raise the collective intelligence of his or her team and keep its members aligned, energized and working to please customers.”

Having spent over 25+ years helping people and organizations through the world of leadership and strategic level change, I have witnessed exceptional leaders who have raised the collective intelligence, created alignment, and helped people deliver incredible customer service. These particular leaders all have one common characteristic, namely they are learners. They read constantly. They teach continuously and they seek out in-depth and quality time to explore new ideas.

If you are interested in your company becoming a winning and teaching organization, then the best place to start is to sign up for the 2015 From Vision to Action Leadership Training. Through this challenging, interactive curriculum which blends lectures, selected readings, small and large group discussions, and how to skill-building exercises, participants in this four part leadership training gain critical knowledge and skills which improve their ability to be become better leaders. 

For more information, please click on the following link: http://www.chartyourpath.com/VTA-Leadership-Training.html 

Or you can click on the this link for the registration form:http://www.chartyourpath.com/pdf/2015-From-Vision-To-Action-Leadership-Training-Regist.pdf

Participating in the 2015 From Vision to Action Leadership Training is a good first step in the fast paced world of constant organizational change and customer service. It has the potential  to create leaders, who in the long run will help everyone become smarter.

Geery Howe, M.A. Consultant, Executive Coach, Trainer in Leadership, Strategic Planning and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257

Digging Holes with a Red Van - Part #1

In the Green Mountains of Vermont, a beautiful clear-blue sky calls one to take on a grand task, and to see it through to the end. On just such a morning, a co-worker and I decided it was time to go and dig the ice house deeper. Teaching and learning homestead skills at the Farm and Wilderness Foundation in Plymouth, Vermont [in 1980] was a wonderful experience for me, and my favorite time was the deep winter when the staff, volunteers, and participants in the program would cut ice on a small pond and store it for use during the summer camps that ran mid-June through late August. 

Since it was late September and the icehouse was empty, it was the perfect time for us to dig it five-to-seven feet deeper. My friend and I loaded our picks, shovels, and pry-bars into an old red van. Grabbing a rope, a pulley, and a bucket, plus our lunches we slipped out the door, we hopped into the van and drove up into the woods. This particular icehouse was small, and it sat beside a picturesque pond feed by a mountain stream.

When we arrived, the water was still and quiet. The fall Vermont woods were at their full heights of colors. We quietly dug out the last of the sawdust which surrounds the ice when it is placed in the icehouse. Hitting bottom, we both began to dig in earnest. It was hard work because we already seven feet below grade when we started. We also were entering what I like to call “terminal glacial droppings” - pure rocks and sand with little dirt.

During the first hour we made good progress; we heaved the soil, which was mostly rocks with a little dirt, up out of the hole with the pulley, bucket and rope. We had gone down about two feet when I hit something very hard. I stopped and thought to myself, “Not another big rock!” Slowly, I began digging around it so I could get a pry-bar under one corner and pop it out. After ten minutes of digging, my partner and I realized we had unearthed not just another big rock, but a boulder. A good three feet across and, as we estimated, about three to six feet down, this rock was rough and smack dab in the middle of our project.

Because it was one of those beautiful, clear-blue-sky days that call people to want to do grand things and see them through to the end, and because we were young in heart and mind, we decided to move “that puppy right out of there.” Skipping lunch, we shoveled and pried until we had completely exposed the whole rock. It was large, heavy and ugly. We were tough, smart (or at least we thought so at the time), and resourceful. We tied our rope as best we could around the rock. We climbed out of the icehouse and both of us pulled. Nothing happened. It felt like we were trying to lift a small elephant. 

I do not know who suggested it first, but I suspect I was the one. We decided to back the van down to the icehouse, tie the rope around the canoe-trailer hitch, and pull the rock up out of the seven-foot-deep ice house. We thought we were going to be heroes. The icehouse was going to be so much deeper. Bravo for the great diggers.

So with imaginary trumpets blaring, I backed the van down to the icehouse. This was no small feat, given the fact that there really was not a road down to the icehouse and I was attempting to place the van between the icehouse and the pond; I had about a five-and-one-half foot path and no room to spare because on one side was the muddy edge of the pond, and on the other side was a large stump.

Finally, we were ready. The rope was hooked up to the van; I was in the driver’s seat, and my partner was watching the rock to make sure it was still attached to the rope. With the drop of his hand, I slowly put my foot on the accelerator. Since the rock was large and the rope was long, the van slowly crept forward until the rope was taut. When I felt the resistance of the rock, I pushed down a little harder on the accelerator and looked out the rear-view mirror to see what was happening.

Then everything happened very fast. Of course, the rock did not move at all. The rope finally sought the path of least resistance and came away from the rock. My foot was pushing harder on the accelerator when the rope came loose; suddenly the van lurched forward, free of its restraints. Like a mighty horse free from the training harness, the van roared up the hill away from the pond and the icehouse. I was looking backwards and not forwards when this happened, and as the van rocketed forward, the back wheels hit a patch of mud by the edge of the pond and slid sideways toward the pond. In the process of this sideways motion the muffler was punctured by a small tree stump. The van titled for a very brief moment (not brief enough by my standards) on two wheels, and then landed on all four. By then my foot was on the brake and my heart was in my throat. Breathing like a long-distance runner after a big race, I turned off the motor and got out. I was shaking like a leaf in the wind when my partner caught up with me beside the van. “Holy cow, are we lucky,” he said. “Look at the back tire.”

I walked around the van and nearly fainted. The back tire was six inches from the edge of the pond. It is important to note that we were “way up in the woods” at the moment. Specifically, we were a good three-quarters of a day’s walk back to the nearest phone. [Note: this was before cell phones]. Second, I do not think the foundation we were working for would have appreciated paying for a tow truck to hoist a semi-sunken van out of a mountain pond.

Now the the big problem was how to get the van off the stump, which was sticking into the muffler, and away from the pond without losing the van or destroying its underside. At this point in the afternoon, we decide it was time for lunch. We relaxed and talked about our options. After much crawling under the van and poking with shovels, (“Why didn’t we bring an axe?” - “I don’t know. I guess I never used one to dig a hole with.”) we got the stump out of the muffler. With smaller rocks from the bottom of the icehouse, we managed to create enough traction under the wheels so we could extract the back tires out of the mud and up onto solid ground.

Then we faced the question of the bounder at the bottom of the icehouse..... 

To be continued next Monday.

From Listen to the Heart The Transformational Pathway to Health and Wellness by Geery Howe published back in 1991. For more information about the book, please click on the following link:  http://www.chartyourpath.com/Listen-to-the-Heart.html

Geery Howe, M.A. Consultant, Executive Coach, Trainer in Leadership, Strategic Planning and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257

2015 Spring Roundtable - Early Bird Special!

With all of the New Year celebrations in the history books and everyone back to work, now is time for us to turn our attention to the Spring 2015 Roundtable! 

On April 8 - 9, 2015, we will gather at the Courtyard By Marriott in Des Moines/Clive, Iowa for the Spring 2015 From Vision to Action Executive Roundtable. Here is the agenda for your review:

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

8:30 am - Registration

9:00 am - 10:15 am - How do leaders deal with continuous strategic and operational changes at the same time?

10:15 am - 10:30 am - Break

10:30 am - 12:00 pm - How do leaders create a mission driven, core-value led culture?

12:00 pm - 1:30 pm - Lunch and Networking 

1:30 pm - 2:45 pm - How do leaders distinguish between when to build teams and when to build single-leader work groups?

2:45 pm - 3:00 pm - Break

3:00 pm - 4:30 pm - How do leaders hold people accountable?

4:30 pm - Adjourn

Thursday, April 9, 2015

9:00 am - 10:15 am - How does one lead with executive presence?

10:15 am - 10:30 am - Break 

10:30 am - 12:00 pm - Integration and Application

12:00 pm - Adjourn

Starting today through Friday, January 30, I am offering an “early bird” registration price for the Spring 2015 From Vision to Action Executive Roundtable.

If you sign up during this time period, and submit payment before 1/30/15, the price will be $ 275.00 for the two days and $ 175.00 for a single day. Here is the link to the registration form:

http://www.chartyourpath.com/pdf/2015-From-Vision-To-Action-Exec-Roundtable-Regist.pdf

 Please write “early bird special” on it when you send it to me by mail or fax (# 319 - 643 - 2185).

After 1/30/15, the registration price will be $ 295.00 for the two days and $ 195.00 for a single day.

I hope you will reserve April 8 - 9 on your calendar, and e-mail me today about whether or not you and your team are coming. Then, in April when the daffodils are just starting to bloom, all we will need to do is meet at the Spring 2015 From Vision to Action Executive Roundtable.

Thinking ahead and looking forward to seeing you in April!

Geery Howe, M.A. Consultant, Executive Coach, Trainer in Leadership, Strategic Planning and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257

Chaos: Learn to live with uncertainties

Over twenty-seven years ago, I was speaking in Iowa City, Iowa before a group of women business owners when one of the participants came up to me at the end of the evening seminar and said, “When you are ready, I want to publish your first book.” I was completely stunned and really did not know what to say other than “thank-you.” I had never even considered the idea before.

About eight weeks later, I showed her a manuscript for a book called Listen to The Heart: The Transformational Pathway to Health and Wellness. After a period of editing, the book was published in 1988 and I began to share it with people attending my different seminars. Soon, the initial run was completely sold out, much to my surprise and to the delight of the publisher.

So, I sat down and completely rewrote the book. I finished the revised and expanded second edition in October 1990.  I realized recently that 2015 is the 25th anniversary of the second edition. So, in celebration of this milestone, I decided to share a series of essays from the book with all of you during January. Here is the first one called “Chaos: Learn to live with uncertainties.”

I believe that most of us struggle with inner and outer changes, and that this is a natural process. For many, it is not easy to give up the old and to wholly welcome the new. The old way of thinking and acting has been a pattern of survival that has helped us out in many ways and through many uncomfortable or difficult situations. Nevertheless, as we begin to walk a new pathway to clearer levels of health and wellness, we often struggle with large amounts of uncertainty and what appear to be inner and outer levels of chaos. We all would like the pathway to be a four-lane highway with clear signs about upcoming events and appropriate choices of when to exit or how fast to travel onward. Still, more often than not it is a very thin trail and one must take each step carefully.

I remember such a hiking trail in the Green Mountains of Vermont. Called the “Eclectic Trail,” it paralleled a rolling and bubbling stream. I do not think the trail was or had ever been formally blazed through the woods. There are a few simple points of reference when walking this trail and they are these: 1) Going up hill, keep the stream on your left. 2) going downhill, keep the stream on your right. 3) Most important, do not walk too close to the stream’s edge because of unstable, very dangerous, cliffs. Parts of the Eclectic Trail are very obvious by the well-worn pathway, but there are sections at the beginning and near the end where it is more like a consensus exploration for a common thread with everyone heading downhill or uphill. I have specific memories of leading groups down this trail, wandering amongst the pine trees and hardwoods in search of the pathway. We knew the correct direction, but heaven only knew if we were on the correct path. 

In learning to live with chaos, I came across a scientific law called “Prigogine’s law of dissipative structures.” Simply stated, the law says that the world evolves through change - stability is not balance but change. When we come to small and large transitions where we must blend our values and actions in new ways, we need to recognize that chaos is not the enemy but the friend of this process. The more we want everything to be balanced and in harmony, the less ready we are going to be to flow to the next level of understanding and growth. While I like to have stability in my life, I am not completely thrown off balance by times of transition that feel like chaos. My life experiences tend to be in accord with the fact that world evolves through change, and that change is a form of stability. As we come to accept this idea, our pathway to greater levels of health and wellness, though not always clear, is nevertheless educational. 

During the first, and only, fall I lived in Vermont, everyone talked about the hardships of winter, especially for those in isolated valleys like the one where I was living and working. At the time, I was part of a team of people teaching and learning homesteading skills, and the change of the seasons was very important because we needed to be prepared for all kinds of weather and all kinds of situations. As the days got colder and the leaves on the sugar maples turned red and fell, I began to worry about the impending “bad Vermont winter.” The old-timers in the area said that the caterpillars had thicker bands on them than normal so this was going to be the “worst winter in years.” I began dreading the arrival of winter. I looked at the sky every morning as I trudged out to the barns to care for the animals and milk the cows. Every day I inspected the local flora for signs of winter. Waiting and waiting, I became more and more worried about when winter would arrive because I was sure the homesteading crew would be caught unprepared. Like a good Boy Scout, I ranted and raved to the other team members that we must “be prepared,” and the sooner the better. My inner chaos, my worries, were based upon fear and the dread of winter.

Finally, one cold blue morning in late November as I hiked up the hill from my cabin to the barns, I saw the first clear sign of winter. On the high ridge, behind the farmhouse were we had community meals, was a large grove of pine trees. During the night a hoarfrost had covered the entire top half of the ridge with a glaze of ice. Each tree appeared to have been dipped in frosting. As I returned from the barn with two buckets of steaming milk, the sun came out and the ridge top was a sparkle of ice. All my inner, crazy worry was gone in an instant and I was at peace; winter had come to the valley. That day was no different from the previous ones and no different from the coming ones; we always had work to do. Yes, that was a cold winter and I did see more snow and ice than I had before in my life, but the outer world was not in chaos. I had created the inner chaos, and the outer world reflected this inner world. The transition from one season to the next was gradual and the arrival of winter that I feared was going to be a big problem was not really bad at all.

We need to learn to understand how inner feelings can become centered upon a fear of chaos, and we need to be open and receptive to change. We need to remember that we will not always know the correct pathway, but that we often have to trust we are headed in the right direction. The Eclectic Trail, with its clear and unclear parts, was not an easy trail. But it was a constant source of beauty and change. At the bottom of the trail where it merged with a local gravel road, there was a clear-cut pathway through hip high ferns. This was a very calm and still place in the woods. It always felt like we had entered a church, and everyone’s voice dropped. We have to cultivate the peaceful spirit that resides in this kind of place in our inner hearts when we are moving along our pathway to health and wellness. Chaos may scare us but it does not have to overwhelm us. All we need to do is continue our present direction and trust the pathway will open up before us. Chaos is the natural process of change. 

For more information about the book, Listen to the Heart, please click on the following link:  http://www.chartyourpath.com/Listen-to-the-Heart.html

Geery Howe, M.A. Consultant, Executive Coach, Trainer in Leadership, Strategic Planning and Organizational Change Morning Star Associates 319 - 643 - 2257